Newborn Wake Windows
By Kimberley Fernandez - CLD, Baby-Led Sleep & Wellness Specialist
Kimberley has been working with pregnant and new families in their birth and postpartum journey since 2006, and currently supports families in the early days of life with their newborn and sleep support up to age four. You can find out more on the website. Sleep Support Postpartum Support
Too often, while scouring social media posts, I see new parents extra worried about their babies wake windows. And that's valid. Getting sleep pressure right can make a huge difference in how your child sleeps for daytime and overnight. However, when I dig a little deeper I see that their baby is only 3 weeks old. And at that point I can tell they have been sucked into a world where they are trying to get their newborn to sleep like a 1 year old. This is common because people rarely discuss the actual age of their baby when asking questions or telling stories about their baby. And comparing your newborn (ages 0-4 months) to a one year old is like comparing an apple seed to a fully grown apple tree. Similar, but completely different. They are at vastly different stages of life and their sleep will reflect that.
So here's my simple advice on newborn wake windows. When your baby is under the age of 3-4 months, don't even worry about wake windows. That will come. But let's get a little more specific as to why.
In those first couple of months your baby's sleep is determined by food. How long it takes to eat (breastfeeding or bottle feeding), digest and become hungry again. Their wake windows will basically be how long they are awake to feed and snuggle a little before they go back to sleep. In the early weeks your newborn may feed every 1.5 - 3hrs. It does vary wildly based on a number of factors, such as, if you are breastfeeding or formula feeding, if feeding is going well and baby is gaining weight appropriately, if there are no issues with feeding that require help from an LC, or any issues such as tongue tie or if baby is cluster feeding. It's a good rule of thumb to remember that if there are any feeding issues in the early days and weeks, sleep will take a hit.
In the next couple of months you may find baby's wake windows will increase a little as they are now in a stage where they will want to be awake a little more, and you can incorporate tummy time and play. These periods will be shorter than you imagine because baby's capacity for stimulation will be small. So watch for those sleepy cues.
Once you hit the 3-4 month mark, this is when you can start sussing out what baby's natural wake windows are. I recommend writing down when baby wakes, what they do during their wake time, when they sleep and how long they sleep and if they wake up happy or grumpy. This will give you an idea of how much sleep they are getting and what their natural sleep requirements are.
I'm going to propose something wild here. Use a paper and pen or my favourite, a spreadsheet. Apps are find to use if you want to, but what I suggest is you ignore the sleep advice they give. Often times they will tell you to lengthen or shorten wake windows, or promise if you do xyz you will get your baby to sleep 12 hours overnight. Unfortunately, that usually isn't the case. Doing it the old fashioned way, will allow you to learn what your baby's natural wake windows are and what their natural sleep requirements are. And then you won't get frustrated when they don't fit into the box the apps are using. Many times when I work with families it's because their baby has different sleep needs then what they think they should have and they are forcing their baby to something they don't want to do. You can't make someone sleep if they aren't sleepy.
The 4 months sleep regression is right around the corner and the information of what sleep your baby naturally needs will be very helpful. This is also a great time to begin introducing a simple bedtime and naptime routine. Follow baby's cues and be consistent with their sleepy rhythms and that can help you weather this storm better. Once you are through the sleep regression, then you can, if needed, adjust baby's wake windows for better day and night sleep.
And one final tip, in the 3-4 month stage, try to set anchor times. These are specific wake up times and bedtimes every day. These set times can help fine tune baby's circadian rhythm, which in turn will help with the release of melatonin, the sleep hormone.
For more info and support on sleep and your newborn, please join my weekly newsletter What's Up Wednesday!
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